Reminiscing
by lovelyblackheart
Summary: Just your average dead characters talking in their afterlife. Mello, Matt, L and Light. M for language.
1. Chapter 1 Mello

**A/N **_Hell, I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this. Then by then end I was just pissed because I only had a whey protein bar instead of chocolate. On the plus side it's very Mello-ish. If you got that...was who I was talking about...or POV it was from...And for some odd reason this is going to con't, but from different people's POV...after they have died...Next one shall be Matty boy, then either L or Light... :) PS there is some voice talking to them...refered to as 'you'.....I honestly don't know what goes through my mind when I write. _

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I was told that I should never lose, and if I did don't lose the next time. I grew up with this thought in my head, and I refused to lose to anyone, or anything. I would do anything to win, which I guess is what I did.

What did you just say? Oh if I could go back what would I change? Well the first thing that I would change is Matt. I really am sad he died. But I also know that he grew up with the same ideals like me, and hated to lose _almost _as much as me. He would probably punch me if I said I wanted him to live after all this.

Another thing I would change would be Near. Well a few things to do with him, one, beat him many times rather than be beaten. You know the whole '_poor loser_'? Yeah that's me. How many times have I imagined staring down at people in their sleep as I smash their head in with a baseball bat? Not that I did.

_Right away_. I liked to fuck with their minds first. Payback's a bitch, you know.

I know.

I am _dead_ after all.

Secondly, if I was _still_ alive, I would have liked to help Near _sometimes_. He doesn't see things the way I do, and if I had ever gotten over the whole 'I will beat you into the ground' faze (I am still in it, just so you know) before I died, we would have made a kick ass team. Solving the whole Kira case _was_ thanks to me. So I am happy when Near still makes small chocolate offerings to me. That does make me feel a bit better. Until I realize I can't eat the chocolate.

Which brings me to the last thing I miss the most when I was alive, and it pisses me off thinking about it. **CHOCOLATE**. Why the fuck don't we have that as ghosts? It's not _**fair**_. Who ever came up with that fucking stupid idea will get a bullet to the head when they meet me. Who will be fucking pissed off from my lack of the **chocolate** because of the fucker who didn't make **ghost chocolate**. Damn, I'm getting excited thinking about blowing off this guy's head. Or girl's, you never know. I can't really think straight without my **chocolate**.

I can totally understand why Ryuk wanted fresh apples.


	2. Chapter 2 Matt

**A/N** _So this is the second part of the dead characters from Death Note. From Matt's POV. I am realizing I like the make the dead swear a lot. And kinda bitchy...w/e..._

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One thing I regret was that I never finished the cigarette that I had when I was shot. _Multiple times_. I didn't count, sorry I was too busy being _shot_ at. **Fuck**, and the video game I had on pause back at the apartment. I _would_ kill myself for not finishing that game, but I'm _already dead_.

Which means I can tell you many fun stories about Mello. Or should I say Mihael Keehl. Like the time he came crying to me because he lost his chocolate. He was cute then. You know, _before_ the leather infested his wardrobe. Another thing, he liked the attention from the old guys (or well, anyone) for looking the way he did. Attention whore. Though I could probably just be safe calling him a whore, I don't know what he did for a few years, but I do have a nagging feeling that he took that job on.

Oh, plus my name isn't really Matt. I'm sure that you probably know this by now, but it's really Mail Jeevas. Don't ask me why I have the only name sounding fake name.

On the bright side of being dead, my goggles came with me. In case you were wondering ghost still wear clothes, so I'm all toasty and warm in my vest. Don't say I had no fashion sense, stripes are way better than leather or pajamas. I may be third best in Wammy House but I come first in style.

One thing I like being dead. Huh. Besides the goggles? It's pretty easy to stalk people, but then they can't hear or see you so that kinda sucks. But it is still fun, gives me something to do. And every now and then I come across another ghost on the plane of the dead. It's cool to hear their stories about how they died. Normally they are here for revenge or lingering regret so the stories remind me somehow of video games.

Which reminds me, who made it so hard to pick up a game controller? _Just_ because I'm not solid matter. Fuck. I bet Mello is shitting his pants over chocolate right now. I could use a smoke too, I am having withdrawal symptoms.

_No, they do not involve me looking like some twisted freak upside down_.

I just happen to chew on things. Mix this with me trying to pick up that little kid's PSP almost makes me be able to touch real_ live_ things.

Now, I'm just your average poltergeist.


	3. Chapter 3 L

_**A/N** I don't really like this part. I have trouble with getting into L's head (it gets worse with Light) and can't grasp what they are thinking. I think this is a tad out of character with L because he would really hate to lose...but w/e, I made him a tad more chill...and I so want cake now._

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I like to frequent sweet shops. It's a really bad habit, and I leave the moment I realize I _can't_ have that triple layer strawberry and vanilla custard cake, and I'm 100% sure I'll do it again tomorrow. It's just something that I can't stop.

Just like I can't stop following Light-kun. Even thought I know that he is 100% Kira. Light-kun is still my only and best friend. Some things can't be changed.

Like the fact I am dead.

I am oddly content with this knowledge. I do not hold grudges towards the man who caused my death, and I do not mind the fact I cannot interact with those who are still living. After all, I did not interact with many of those who are (_were?_) alive anyways. I can still follow those who I care about, and this is much easier that video cameras and voice recordings.

I bring my thumb up to my mouth, and watch as Light-kun laughs, his eyes shine with insanity. I know you are Kira, but I cannot prove this fact.

You won.

Surprisingly I am fine with watching everything play out. I played my part in this game, I lost, and I am thankful enough to be able to see the outcome.

I still wish for some cake though. Or maybe a cup of coffee with sugar cubes. I would also be happy with a strawberry.


	4. Chapter 4 Light

Ryuk said that there is no heaven or hell for me. He was right. Where I am now is much worse than any hell could be.

I saw how the world ended up without me to rule it, and the _poor pathetic people_ that are still alive have not _changed_ their ways from before I came. Those _fuckers_ **forgot** who their god-damned _**GOD** _was! My nails dug into the palm of my hand and what would normally cause it to bleed just left an indent and went back to normal.

The dead cannot bleed after all.

I would have attempted to punch a tree, there was no one who could see me vent the anger I had bottled up, but I already knew my fist would not collide with the wood, and instead go through.

I am not real now. The only people who believe in me are crazy.

I am not used to this, from having the whole world bow at my feet to having no one understand.

I wonder if L is a spirit too.

I like to think of different words that can be used describe me now. I used to be a human, a ningen, which also can be referred to as homo sapiens. Now, I can have a wide choice of words to choice from; ghost, spirit, phantom, Yurei, demon, apparition, ghoul, poltergeist, or banshee.

At the moment, I prefer ghost, the word has German roots in the words anger and fury. Which is what I feel towards the world.

I punch the tree in frustration, although I already know what will happen.

I will find a way to become God, _even_ in the state I am in.

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**A/N** I am not really sure if this seems like Light or not. I think he is a bit too...angry at the word. Like I said before, getting into his head and trying to be like L and Light is really hard...because I am not really all that similar to them. I think I may end up sticking with Mello and Matt oneshots from now on, hahaa I can understand them. Well this is the end of this odd muliti-chapter story. I hope you enjoyed it.


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